But the wisdom from above is first of all pure, then peaceable, gentle, accommodating, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial, and sincere.

James 3:17

I never thought of myself as all that bright and these days that is confirmed!  Dear me!  I am looking for the title of our wrecked Avalon, no luck so far.  That is just an indicator, I suppose you would say, of that.

I love these descriptives – pure, peaceable, gentle, accommodating, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial, sincere.  Wow.  I need to go over this check list for the day!  As I try to describe my day so far, none of these adjectives fit – none at all.  My trust is mixed with fears.  My peace seems to be so shallow.  Gentle?  Me?  My personality is that I am a pusher!  Accommodating to what?  Certainly not to what other people think of me.  Now, this must stop – full of mercy!  Me.  I have enough trouble loving myself – let alone others.  Full of good fruit?  Today it is mostly chiding myself for loosing some important papers, and other burrs in the saddle.  I do not like that part of me.  Impartial?  That is what I do, sort people out, like those I like and just ignoring all thought of the others.  And sincere.  I feel conflicted and not at all sure that all I do, and think are of God.

So, there.  That is why I need God’s abundant mercy.  I didn’t realize I was struggling so until I placed my feelings alongside the mercies of my loving, saving God.  I kneel in humility.  Lord, teach me, once again, to trust you!